In 2009, I learned that there was no realistic way my best friend would ever be able to become a father -- his greatest desire in life. I decided then that I would offer to be a surrogate for him (which didn’t sound realistic at the time). A year later, I made that offer. He accepted, and in Nov. 2011 I got pregnant.

I’m writing this blog because I’m not the typical surrogate. For one, in the terms of the trade, I’m an altruistic traditional surrogate (I’m unpaid and the egg is mine) with a totally open arrangement with the dads. Most importantly, though, this is my first pregnancy (NO ONE thinks this is a good idea; most surrogates already have their own kids).

Also, we’re all gay, so this is going to be the gayest baby ever.*

- The Deputy

*Except for the children of those many, many other sets of three or more gays who decided to combine their powers to procreate...

March 12, 2012

And then I woke up...

I dreamt last night about giving birth.  A few moments after the big event, I turned to the male nurse next to me and said "Was that as easy as I think it was? Did I LOOK like I was in a lot of pain?" and then I watched Winchester nervously fling the bloody, shit covered baby against his bare chest. I turned to my doula and laughed with her at him. I then got up, a little woozy, and decided that it was time for me to eat! I walked down to the hospital cafeteria, randomly bumped into some friends from high school, and got some sushi.

Can it be like this please?


  1. mmmm sushi. My "first meal" is going to be a huge plate of raw sushi and a sizable glass of wine.
    Hiring a doula is the first step to insuring the possibility of it being something like that! :)

    1. Hahaha, yeah - I can't pretend I don't miss booze!!

      I'm super lucky to be friends with a doula - and one who just happens to be the most positive, calming, lovely character I know (and I don't speak in superlatives often)! If you were in the New York region, i'd HIGHLY recommend her, even though I haven't done this thing yet.