In 2009, I learned that there was no realistic way my best friend would ever be able to become a father -- his greatest desire in life. I decided then that I would offer to be a surrogate for him (which didn’t sound realistic at the time). A year later, I made that offer. He accepted, and in Nov. 2011 I got pregnant.

I’m writing this blog because I’m not the typical surrogate. For one, in the terms of the trade, I’m an altruistic traditional surrogate (I’m unpaid and the egg is mine) with a totally open arrangement with the dads. Most importantly, though, this is my first pregnancy (NO ONE thinks this is a good idea; most surrogates already have their own kids).

Also, we’re all gay, so this is going to be the gayest baby ever.*

- The Deputy

*Except for the children of those many, many other sets of three or more gays who decided to combine their powers to procreate...

August 7, 2012

"Altruistic" vs. "Commercial" Surrogacy

Recently, a reader commented on my lecture on surrogacy pointing out that all surrogacy is altruistic, regardless of whether money is exchanged. The failings of the current terminology are not news to me, and I'd talked about them in the lecture, though they hadn't made it into the slides. But what's a girl to do when right from Reproductive Technology Council comes this definition:

Altruistic surrogacy: Altruistic surrogacy means a practice whereby a woman agrees, for no financial gain, to become pregnant and bear a child for another person or persons to whom she intends to transfer the child’s care at, or shortly after, the child’s birth. (Specific expenses incurred, associated with the pregnancy and birth, may be reimbursed).

The alternative term you can find floating around is compassionate surrogacy. OH! Well take a huge sigh of relief, because THAT's certainly better!!!

August 6, 2012

32-33 week fetus

While babycenter is calling it a pineapple or jicama (a vegetable - fruit?? - I'm not even familiar enough with to judge), I now say that you are carrying a chihuahua in your belly (at about 4 pounds 17 inches)
Isn't that cuter than a jicama???

August 4, 2012

30-31 week fetus

Babycenter really blew it this week. They couldn't even find a single fruit to misguidedly compare your fetus to - they had to settle for FOUR navel oranges! Lame!

My point of comparison is much more tangible (to me) than 4 navel oranges. So tangible that I am touching it right now. As I do every day. For what often seems like most hours of the day.

I am speaking, of course, of my lifeline. My 3lb 16" diameter MacBook Air: