In 2009, I learned that there was no realistic way my best friend would ever be able to become a father -- his greatest desire in life. I decided then that I would offer to be a surrogate for him (which didn’t sound realistic at the time). A year later, I made that offer. He accepted, and in Nov. 2011 I got pregnant.

I’m writing this blog because I’m not the typical surrogate. For one, in the terms of the trade, I’m an altruistic traditional surrogate (I’m unpaid and the egg is mine) with a totally open arrangement with the dads. Most importantly, though, this is my first pregnancy (NO ONE thinks this is a good idea; most surrogates already have their own kids).

Also, we’re all gay, so this is going to be the gayest baby ever.*

- The Deputy

*Except for the children of those many, many other sets of three or more gays who decided to combine their powers to procreate...

June 23, 2012

28-29 week fetus

By this point, likens your fetus to a head of cauliflower or chinese cabbage. I give them some credit for cauliflower - that is one surprisingly consistently sized vegetable! Not sure I've ever seen a head of chinese cabbage in real life, so I'm not even going there. The problem is that they have COMPLETELY MISREPRESENTED the size of your fetus. Why would you put up a photo of a head of cauliflower, about 7" in diameter and 1lb or so, and then tell you your fetus is 14.5" and 2lbs??? Crazies!!

Well, at 29 weeks your fetus is 15" and 40oz. I know I put up a bottle of champagne last time, but I just couldn't help myself from continuing the alcohol trend, because who hears 40oz and thinks of anything other than malt liquor?! Not me, and I don't even drink that shit when I'm not pregnant.

June 1, 2012

Q: from a prospective surrogate

The Deputy,

I am so happy I found your blog.  My gay brother has asked me to be his (altruistic) surrogate.  I am very much interested however the 'fear of the unknown' is most certainly very much present, as this too will be my first pregnancy.  I'm 28 and do want kids on my own, however I've always said I will adopt as my view on kids is - why give birth when there are so many in need of parents already out there! Well anyway, I just wanted to see how your pregnancy is going, you should be around your 3rd trimester now, right? How are you feeling physically and emotionally?

Hi! Thanks for getting in touch! Sounds like you're very much in my boat. I really won't be able to give any advice until this is over (and my advice probably won't be any good until many years have gone by) but it doesn't sound like that's really what you're asking for. So I'll happily provide an update: