C-section woes

I was really upset about having a c-section. From the moment Hottie Midwife first said the word till right now, I've been upset about it. Not only was I really upset about the c-section itself, but it sent me into months of soul searching over WHY I was so upset about it, which was probably more annoying than the c-section itself.


Let me first share with you some of the reasons I considered, which I have since realized were NOT, in fact, bothering me:

Q: from a prospective surrogate

The Deputy,


I am so happy I found your blog.  My gay brother has asked me to be his (altruistic) surrogate.  I am very much interested however the 'fear of the unknown' is most certainly very much present, as this too will be my first pregnancy.  I'm 28 and do want kids on my own, however I've always said I will adopt as my view on kids is - why give birth when there are so many in need of parents already out there! Well anyway, I just wanted to see how your pregnancy is going, you should be around your 3rd trimester now, right? How are you feeling physically and emotionally?

Hi! Thanks for getting in touch! Sounds like you're very much in my boat. I really won't be able to give any advice until this is over (and my advice probably won't be any good until many years have gone by) but it doesn't sound like that's really what you're asking for. So I'll happily provide an update:

Please let it be a pregnancy symptom when...

I feel like a spoiled, bratty, 3-year-old who knocks over large canned bean displays at the super market when he doesn't get what he wants (my id is a boy, btw). He's always there, but he's been making his presence known more lately. The worst part is the horror felt by his mom (my superego) upon seeing the carnage in the bean-aisle and then the pointless arguments that ensue.

oh well -- it's good to get in touch with your primal side, right???

Ignoring and acknowledging pregnancy

Reason #53 why being a surrogate for your first pregnancy is different: my current lifestyle.

Sooo... you never see pregnant chicks out at bars. And definitely not at clubs. Ok, yeah, fine, we can't drink -- but I don't think that's why. People go out and don't drink all the time: they're driving, have to work early, they're broke... whatever. So why does pregnancy suddenly make them stop? 

A lot of pregnant ladies already have kids, and people with kids go out less, so there's one possible factor. But what about first timers? My only guess is that they're nesting -- getting ready for the Parenthood. I can see that happening with Winchester, even. He who used to stay up all night drinking whisky and smoking cigs is now in bed knitting at 10pm.

I'm not knitting, and I most certainly am not preparing for the Parenthood. So where does that leave me? As the only pregnant chick at the club. And it's kinda awesome -- going out sober is a totally worthwhile experiment (though I probably wouldn't make it a 9 month experiment if I had my druthers!). First, people watching becomes 1,000x funnier: drunk people are so silly! Second, dancing sober allows me to incorporate my work out routine into my social time: you see my awesome new dance move? Yeah, it's a hindu squat with calf raises. Drunk Deputy never would have pulled that off.